Marco Arment has released a new app focused on reminding people like me.

I have ADHD. Probably.

My entire adolescence was defined by forgetting to do my homework, disappointing everyone around me, and being told by every adult that I was lazy, “just” needed to try harder, and wasn’t living up to my potential.

I’ll be working on the resulting shame and anxiety for the rest of my life.

If someone tells me, “Remember to pick up the dry cleaning tomorrow,” I definitely won’t remember.

If someone tells me, “Remember to put the laundry in the dryer in ten minutes,” I probably won’t even remember that.

If you’re thinking, “It’s just ten minutes! Nobody can possibly forget that,” I have made an app that’s probably not for you.

A few years ago, I came to the realization with a counselor that I, too, have ADHD. Probably.1 That carried a lot with it given that my brother was diagnosed with the same at a much earlier age and I seemed to skirt by the adult detection system because I did my homework.

But I was predominantly homeschooled through elementary and middle school. I did well in the classes I liked and got by in the others. I had other behavioral prevailing issues that let this sort of diagnosis never occur.

Ironically, I have never really used reminders well. There is untold proverbial corpses of things I have been asked to do or said I would do in my wake. Just the other day, I told my dad I would come over right after I finished a document, a task that had a sentence or two left. My dad lives next door. He walked out of my office, I finished the note, and then went inside my house to cook dinner. Crap, I forgot to take the meat out of the freezer.

I live by notepads, sticky notes, and attempted systems inside Reminders and Things. This year I have leaned into using Field Notes every day just to write down what I need to do that day and it has been a huge help. Within the last two weeks, I have started carrying the notebook and a pen everywhere I go—if I remember.

Reminders and other apps are too easily dismissed by me. The notification would sit there on the lock screen and eventually I'd get sick of staring at it that I'd dismiss it, delete it, or falsely check it off just to rid myself of the notification. They never seemed to alert me when I could actually take care of the task. I'd never get around to it.

Which brings me to Unforgetful, which Marco describes as "Reminders for ADHD."

  • It’s impossible to lose a task. Notifications always repeat, even if you miss or dismiss them, until the task is completed or deleted.
  • Designed for procrastination. Snoozing is a core feature, with thoughtful intervals that scale as you snooze a task more.
  • Nothing is hidden away. A hidden task is a forgotten task. No folders, no tags, no organization, no different views or modes.
  • No judgment or shame. Nothing is overdue. You’re not in trouble. Everything is either due now or in the future. Didn’t get to it today? Maybe tomorrow. Every day is a fresh start.

Marco also thought of the most frustrating part of using third-party reminders apps; that weird dance with Siri about specifying where to put the reminder. Unforgetful just uses your Reminders data. Turn off Reminders notifications and turn on Unforgetful's. I don't have to think of the delicate dance with Siri. I just say "Remind me..." and Unforgetful will.

I signed up for the generous free month trial and have started living with it. I think this is going to help me and my family in ways my systems never have.

Footnotes

  1. Like Marco, I haven't gotten a an official diagnosis because I don't actually want medication. I have seen its affects on my brother and heard enough accounts from others. I have no desire to become dependent on medication to alter the way I think or act. That's a personal choice and not an admonishment of meds for others. Am I living on "hard mode?" Probably. ↩