# Facing *Ragnarök* – Memory Card #40 👋🏻 All has been quiet on the proverbial Western front of essay creation. I was diving down the research paper rabbit hole—like real, honest published research papers. But my creative work has slowed to a halt. The 9-to-5 joby job hunt for new clients or a new gig has consumed my waking mind. What an absolute roller coaster finding work is. Constant selling one's self, thinking about selling one's self, doubting the sale of one's self, facing rejection of one's self. I've never seen or even know what *Death of a Salesman* is about, but my brain is like "same bro." This week has been up and down with confidence and discouragement. I had a strange bubbled-up sense of guilt about no new updates to the newsletter. I mean, this currently goes out to six people (one of them is myself), all of whom know and are aware of the situation without my needing to inundate their inbox. But here toward the end of the week, I am feeling better. Some billable work has come in, and while it is not enough, it has provided interesting and fun opportunities for me. I actually wrote this letter two days ago and was hesitant to send it. That felt in the face of the spirit of the newsletter though, which is the chronicle my creative process. That includes highs and lows. I am eager to come back and dive into making this next essay, but I have to get this job situation in order first. At least the ideas and tidbits keep flowing in and I dutifully write those down. Good fodder for future endeavors. Slightly related though, I did need some early footage from *God of War: Ragnarök* for this next essay annnnnnnnd it is on my list for [games to beat in 2025](https://maxfrequency.net/2025/01/07/max-frequency-year-five/), so I began my replay earlier in the week. To spice it up a bit, I am playing on the second hardest difficulty ("**Give Me God of War**" sounded too scary for me) and, for what I think is the first time ever, I am playing a game on New Game +. It's kinda cool. I get *everything* off the bat? Even the mid-late game third weapon?! This has immediately jazzed my mentality going in. I don't think I'll be completing all the side quests and extra bosses, since I did that already, but NG+ is sorta kinda enticing me? The real carrot at the end of this is the Valhalla DLC, which I have heard only excellent things about. Due to my capture limitations, I am not actually using the full power of the PS5 Pro to play. I really want to have those 90-100 frames per second. Your boy needs a beefier computer for that. Some day... I had some issues with *Ragnarök* when it came out. I am curious how they hold up, particularly the player and character motivation being out of alignment. When the game came out, my kid was *just* over one month old. Now she is two and a half. I don't know how I am going to feel about a dad narrative about your child growing up and moving out right now. > “If you don’t want him to walk away from you, than smarten up and walk with him awhile...” Too soon Mimir, too soon. Until next time... > [!email]+ Memory Card Newsletter > This letter is one block from the newsletter **[Memory Card](https://buttondown.com/MaxFrequency)** by [Max Roberts](https://www.maxfrequency.net/about). Thoughts? Send *me* an email at [email protected]. > > Max is the writer and producer behind [Max Frequency](https://www.maxfrequency.net), a place where he cultivates and curates curiosity—both for himself and for others—by delighting in the details and growing greatness from small beginnings. > > He's written a [[Chasing the Stick - The History of Naughty Dog during the PS4 Era|rich history and dive on the making of Naughty Dog's The Last of Us Part II]], celebrated the [[MFP23 - “A Passion for Smash” – Celebrating 15 Years of Super Smash Bros. Brawl with Peter Spezia|15th anniversary of Super Smash Bros. Brawl with the voice behind its hype]], and examined how [Zelda "stole" Fortnite's best mechanic](https://youtu.be/kc2l_9Fdpek). > > **Memory Card** is a real-ish time, raw, drip feed newsletter of his creative process for telling these stories. It’s *how* The Thing™ gets made. You can sign up below. (Look down) > > It's all powered by [Max Frequency](https://www.maxfrequency.net) and [patrons](https://www.patreon.com/maxfrequency). > > Wanna see The Thing™? [Check it out on YouTube](https://youtube.com/MaxRobertsEssays). Read it on [The Blog](https://www.maxfrequency.net). > <iframe scrolling="no" style="width:100%!important;height:220px;border:1px #ccc solid !important" src="https://buttondown.com/MaxFrequency?as_embed=true"></iframe>